Communication is a two-way process, and it is important that adults supporting autistic children are aware that communication is not simply verbal or 鈥渘euromajority鈥 communication methods.
A key aspect of the diagnosis criteria for autism is that autistic children have a difference in how they perceive and understand non-verbal communication. Given that around 80% of typical interaction is nonverbal, it means that a significant amount of communication and 鈥渃lues鈥 to intent and purpose are lost or misunderstood by autistic children. Autistic children will often talk about 鈥渘ot getting鈥 social rules or the real intentions behind a person spoken communication.
Some books written by autistic individuals emphasize this point of feeling 鈥渙utside鈥 of everyday social understanding, such as 鈥淢artian In The Playground鈥 by Clare Sainsbury.
Children with autism present with differences in how they communicate and also how they interpret other people鈥檚 communication. Autistic children can struggle to read and understand other鈥檚 perspectives, thoughts, and emotions. This might present in different ways, with children appearing seemingly rude, for example, or they may 鈥渙ver-read鈥 other people, leading to worry and anxiety. Many autistic children benefit from peers and adults being clearer in their thoughts and feelings and having the opportunity to practice interpreting them.
Differences and challenges maintaining friendships is a distinct part of the diagnosis criteria for autism and is a common area of difficulty for autistic children. Some autistic children might not struggle obviously in this area, whereas other present with challenges such as:
- having no friendships, although they would like them
- fixating on one particular friend
- believing they have a number of friendships when, in fact, the 鈥渇riendships鈥 are not reciprocal
- thinking they have no friends when they actually do, but cannot recognise this